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Chapter 12: If he remembers

Chapter 12: If he remembers

Leviana still held Lathel in her arms, one hand resting behind his neck, the other directed toward Catrina. The thin layer of ice around her fingertips had not yet melted, but the killing intent in the room had eased after the two women confirmed that the other had also returned from the previous timeline.

Lathel looked at Leviana, then turned to the masked woman.

He didn’t know Catrina, yet she understood his sign language, mentioned a wedding that had never existed, and said she wanted to take him away from here. Leviana had also recognized her at first glance, and the two had even spoken of a previous life he had absolutely no memory of.

Though he wasn’t skilled at reading people’s hearts, Lathel still understood that both of them were hiding a secret that had to do with him.

Leviana saw the doubt in his eyes, but now was not the time for explanations.

"Lathel, step outside and wait a moment. I have a few private things to discuss with Catrina."

He didn’t stand up right away but signed:

"Are you two going to fight?"

Leviana watched those familiar gestures. She didn’t deliberately mistranslate the way she had when teasing him before, only shaking her head.

"No. We just need to clarify a few things."

Lathel shifted his gaze to Catrina.

She answered calmly: "I don’t intend to hurt her either."

Leviana looked at her coolly. "You say that as if you’re certain you could."

Catrina placed her hand on the hilt of her foil.

"At the very least, you don’t look like someone who could fight for long right now."

The tension that had just eased immediately returned.

Lathel raised both hands between them and signed:

"If you need help, call me."

Leviana nodded.

He stood, but before leaving he still adjusted the pillow behind her back, pulled the blanket up to cover both her legs, and moved the cup of water to where she could easily reach it.

Only after confirming everything was in order did Lathel pick up the board and chalk and step outside.

The door closed.

The sound of footsteps stopped just outside rather than moving away.

He was still waiting.

Leviana looked at the door for a few seconds, then turned back. The gentleness on her face vanished instantly.

"You’ve revealed too much."

Catrina pulled a chair over to face her.

"I don’t want to wait any longer."

"That’s not a reason to mention a wedding in front of someone who’s never met you."

"He isn’t a stranger."

"Not to you."

Leviana frowned.

"But to the Lathel of right now, you’re just a masked woman who broke into his room, declared you once wanted to be his wife, and then demanded to take him away."

Catrina didn’t respond.

Leviana continued: "The sign language too. That’s a personal system of signs Lathel has always used. I don’t know where he learned it, but almost no one in this world can understand it."

"You understand it too."

"During the three years Lathel cared for me, he used those signs every day. I couldn’t open my eyes or move at the time, but with the perception of a Sage, I could still pick up on some of the changes in his mana, movements, and intent."

Leviana paused, then went on: "I told Lathel that I only understood a little thanks to a Sage’s abilities. But you took one look and understood everything he said. You even answered immediately, without a moment’s hesitation."

Catrina looked at the door.

"He’s already suspicious?"

"Obviously."

Leviana made no effort to hide her irritation.

"You also brought Black Rose to Grail Pass years ahead of schedule and openly attacked Aldric in front of Avarenne guards. You’re telling him outright that what he knows about the future is no longer accurate."

"I took one of his Void Step Talismans."

"That’s a good result."

"Then what are you blaming me for?"

"I’m blaming you for only thinking about what you wanted to do, without thinking about what happens after."

Catrina tightened her hand slightly.

"I’ve waited for him too long."

The voice beneath the mask was still calm, but Leviana heard the faintest tremor inside it.

"In the last life, I sat in my wedding dress waiting from morning until night. By the time the candles had nearly burned out, a guard covered in blood finally walked in."

Leviana fell silent.

Catrina looked down at her hands.

"I was still wearing that dress when I went to find him. Snow covered the road, the hem was stained with mud and blood, but I still thought that if I could just get there in time, I could still save him."

Her hands slowly clenched.

"But Lathel was already cold."

"I held him, poured every last drop of mana into his body, used the best medicines I had, even wanted to trade my own soul. Nothing answered back."

Through the mask, Catrina’s eyes gradually turned cold.

"I had to wait until I died before I got the chance to see him again. Do you want me to keep standing at a distance, pretending he means nothing to me?"

"I’m not asking you to pretend."

Leviana looked her straight in the eye.

"I’m asking you to use your head."

Catrina lifted her gaze.

"You think you’ve gotten Lathel back? No. The Lathel of right now doesn’t remember you, doesn’t know Black Rose, and certainly doesn’t know why a strange woman wants to take him to the Veyr territory."

"I can make him remember."

"And then what?"

Catrina went still.

Leviana didn’t let her dodge.

"Do you think the feelings Lathel had for you appeared out of thin air? He met you when everyone else saw you as a calamity. He didn’t recoil from the cursed face, didn’t pity you, and didn’t try to exploit your title."

"He stayed by your side when the family isolated you, helped investigate your former husband, and step by step made you believe you could still live like a normal person."

Leviana looked at the silver mask.

"But none of that has happened yet."

Catrina said nothing.

"If you take Lathel to your territory right now, the original meeting disappears. He’ll no longer have the chance to help you the way he did in the last life, and neither of you will go through the things that made you understand each other."

Leviana spoke each word clearly:

"You can protect him, but that doesn’t mean he’ll love you the way he did before."

Catrina’s hand trembled faintly.

She didn’t fear Aldric, didn’t fear the curse, and had never feared death. But the mere thought of Lathel looking at her with the eyes one gives a stranger was enough to make her chest feel unbearably heavy.

"I’ll make him fall in love with me again."

Catrina answered, but her voice no longer held the certainty it had before.

"Then don’t destroy everything before it even begins."

Leviana leaned back against the pillows. Her complexion had grown paler, but this conversation couldn’t stop now.

"There’s another possibility."

"What?"

"What if our presence causes Lathel to remember?"

Catrina frowned.

"Wouldn’t that be a good thing?"

"Are you sure about that?"

The room went silent.

In Catrina’s mind, a dark hallway from the previous life surfaced.

Lathel had once stood outside her room, desperately signing about some kind of danger. At the time, Catrina assumed he had been sent by the family to spy on her and immediately ordered her guards to drive him away.

That night, assassins left behind by her former husband broke into the estate.

Lathel had tried to warn her.

But she hadn’t given him the chance.

Another time, he brought her a vial of medicinal fluid that could ease the pain caused by the curse. Catrina thought Lathel was pitying her and threw it straight to the ground.

The vial shattered right in front of him.

Lathel didn’t get angry. He only knelt down and picked up each shard of glass. Blood ran from his palm, but he still tried to salvage whatever medicine remained, as though what had been destroyed was more than just a remedy.

Much later, Catrina learned that Lathel had traded half of his own lifespan for that vial.

Not money.

Not some treasure.

Half of his life.

And she had smashed it on the ground simply because she didn’t want the pity that Lathel had never been offering in the first place.

Catrina’s nails dug deep into her palm.

A thin line of blood trailed down her wrist.

Leviana was also remembering things of her own.

She had once ordered guards to shove Lathel out of the way when he tried to warn her about a sabotaged wheel. Had slapped him across the face in front of others because she thought he was using the chance to touch her wrist, when all he wanted was to stop the curse from spreading.

The worst was the day Lathel blocked her path outside the hidden chamber.

He had tried to tell her that Aldric had prepared a dangerous array, but Leviana couldn’t understand those signs, and didn’t have the patience to look.

She had coldly called for someone to drag him away.

That very same day, Aldric ripped the magic veins from her body.

"If he remembers, he’ll remember the times we pushed him away before he remembers that he once loved us."

Leviana’s voice dropped low.

"Lathel can forgive. He’s always been far too quick to forgive others."

She looked at Catrina.

"But do we have the right to expect his forgiveness?"

Catrina didn’t answer.

In the room, only the faintest sound of two people breathing remained.

A long time passed before she finally unclenched her fists.

"Then you want us to keep lying to him?"

"I want us to give him time."

Leviana answered: "Don’t deliberately trigger his memories, don’t say too much about the previous life, and don’t force him to accept our feelings. When Lathel truly trusts us, we’ll tell him everything."

"What if he never remembers?"

"Then make him fall in love with us in this life."

Catrina looked at her.

"Us?"

"Don’t misunderstand."

Leviana said calmly: "I have no intention of giving him up to you."

"Neither do I."

"At least that much is clear."

Catrina looked at Leviana’s increasingly pale complexion.

"What’s wrong with you?"

Leviana closed her eyes for a few seconds before answering:

"After waking, I can only maintain consciousness for about four hours each day."

Catrina immediately sat up straight.

"Four hours?"

"The rest of the time I have to sleep so my soul and body can continue harmonizing."

"Why didn’t you say so earlier?"

"You showed up wanting to take Lathel away. I had no reason to tell you my weaknesses."

Catrina fell silent.

Leviana looked at her.

"But right now, I need your hands."